His Brain, Her Brain -- How Divinely Designed Differences Can Strengthen Your Marriage

by Walt Larimore, M.D. and Barb Larimore

Counselors can benefit from the research summarized in this book. The author is a medical doctor who says, "During my years in medical practice, I became aware of the findings of dozens of scientists who had begun to discover innumerable innate differences between the brains of men and women." (p. 22). "A mountain of brain research published during the last two decades reveals dramatic anatomical, chemical, hormonal, and physiological differences between his brain and her brain." (p. 29).

The authors draw upon such distinguished resources as:

Simon Baron-Cohen, PhD., neuropsychologist from Cambridge University
Louanne Brizendine, MD, neuropsychiatrist at the University of California, San Francisco
Anne Moir, Ph.D., geneticist
Racquel E. Gur, MD, PhD., Professor of Psychiatry and Neurology
Reuben C. Gur, PhD, Professor of Psychology at Penn Behavioral Health
Eric Vilian, PhD, Associate Professor of Human Genetics, Pediatrics and Urology at UCLA
Huntington Willard, PhD, Professor of Genome Sciences at Duke University
Laura Carrel, PhD, Associate Professor of Biochemistry and Molecular Biology at Penn State Univ.
Leonard Sax, MD, PhD in Psychology
Turhan Canli, PhD, Associate Professor of BioPsychology at Stoney Brook University

Counselors will learn that:

1. The corpus callosums in men and women are different. When girls and women are under stress, they want to talk to other girls or women. When boys or men are under stress, they want to either do something physical or be left alone.
2. Men have a much higher sex drive than women because men have a much larger hypothalamus, more testosterone, and more vasopressin.
3. A wife would be most receptive to making love to her husband after they have had an enjoyable conversation.
4. A husband can listen better to his wife if he minimizes distractions.
5. A wife can listen to multiple conversations at one time.
6. A wife is more sensitive to touch than her husband is.
7. A husband will withdraw from his wife when he is upset because it takes him much longer to process emotion.
8. Men usually become quiet when dealing with a project, problem, emotion, or stress, because their brains were designed to do one thing at a time. While their right brain is solving a problem or dealing with an emotion, it's difficult for their left brains to listen or speak.
9. Women experience the pleasure of the hormone oxytocin when they have conversations.
10. Wives can increase their husbands' participation in household chores by being direct, concrete, and factual rather than being indirect and emotional.
11. Women can read men better than men can read men, because women are better at sensing, understanding, and predicting the behaviors of others.
12. Mothers are far better at nurturing children than fathers are, and children prefer their mother's comfort over their father's comfort by 14 to 1.
13. The Bible teaches husbands to honor their wives. Studies show that when a husband makes this decision to honor his wife, the husband's feelings toward his wife will change within 6 weeks.