HOW THIS BOOK IS HELPFUL TO COUNSELORS
Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child’s Attitude, Behavior &
Character in 5 Days
by Dr. Kevin Lehman
The author is an internationally-known psychologist and author of over 30 books. In this book, he presents an effective method of parenting that counselors can teach to their parent-clients. This method is simple but requires practice. The parent tells the child that B can happen after A is completed, where "B" is what the parent wants the child to do and "A" is what the child wants to happen. The parent says it once, turns his or her back, and then walks away, avoiding power struggles. The parent learns to respond rather than react. The author teaches that most kids misbehave because they are trying to get the parent's attention.
The author shows how this strategy can be applied to many practical situations, including:
1. Allowances. The value of saving at an early
age, developing financial self-reliance, and using allowances to pay a sibling
to do missed chores.
2. Anger. How to help children express their emotions.
3. Attending church. What parents can do when teens don't want to go to church.
4. Attention-seeking behavior. How parents should respond when this is negative.
5. Baths. What parents can do when young children don't want to take a bath.
6. Bedtime battles. Establishing nightly routines.
8. Communicating/Not communicating. The best way for parents to get their child to talk.
9. Curfew. How to establish one and what to do when it is violated.
10. Defiance. How parents can respond to regular defiance.
12. Fighting in the car.
13. Ignoring parents.
14. Internet. Protecting children from pornography.
15. Irresponsible driving.
16. Isolation in their rooms. How parents can accept a certain amount of this as normal, and to learn not to ask their teen too many questions, which increases isolation.
17. Lateness. Often caused by an overly critical parent and the child is deliberately late in order to avoid being criticized by that parent.
18. Laziness. How to get children to do chores without having power struggles.
19. Not getting up in the morning.
20. Overeating. Avoiding junk food.
22. Picky Eaters.
23. Pornography. Setting up blocks on the childrens' computer.
24. Potty Training.
26. Talking Back.
27. Temper Tantrums.